Remember

I have been meaning to make an update but I never know what to talk about. Right now my life consists on school and work. I have no life and I miss it. I miss my friends :( I never see anyone anymore and it sucks. It feels like I have no friends but I know I do I just never get time to see them. I feel lonely...Well I think next semester I am going to cut my classes down because I dont think I can do this much work next semester too. It's all getting to me. I wish I had more free time. Every minute I have to do an assignment or study for an exam.GRRRRRRRRRRRRR Two exams every week. No one else has two exams every week during university. Well I must go get food and be on my way to I/O(worst class in the world).
-Edna

I watched the movie Miss Potter tonight, it was beautiful, very touching. It reminded me of the fact that one day I want to move out of the city and live in the country. I hate the city it is so gloomy and depressing. I really need the smell of the fresh air, the open space. A slower paced life. Everyone here is in such a hurry, no one sits down anymore, looks at someone and asks," how are you today? I have all the time in the world." Life just isn't the same without being surrounded by nature. I miss going out and picking berries, getting lost in the woods, playing with cows, sitting on wooden swing sets my uncle made. You can never forget the wooden stoves, the smell of wood burning when you walked up the path. Hot chocolate is not hot chocolate unless you get it after you play in the snow all day. I want to make a snowman, and make a snow fort. I was the queen at snow forts, they were huge!

Oh I can't wait for winter, and home; Newfoundland.

Tonight was the first night in months that I have actually tried to go out, and guess what?
I failed. Here I am at Saint Mary's and I forgot my id at home and now I can't go to the pub. I wanted to hang out with everyone from school so much and now I can't. I came here for no reason and I'm so upset I don't know what to do. I'm trying so hard to not be upset because I am here with Matt and his friends but it is so hard to pretend everything is ok when lately it isn't. Nothing is going right these days, it's Halloween and I am sober and not out partying. It would be fine if I had a little fun lately.
I'm giving up.
Nothing is working out.
Fuck.

This song has been stuck in my head all day, well these two parts of it...

Somedays aren't yours at all,
They come and go
As if they're someone else's days
They come and leave you behind someone else's face
And it's harsher than yours
And colder than yours

Downtown, Downtown
I'm not here, not anymore
I've gone away
Don't call me, don't write

I know almost one person in each of my classes this year. I am gonna miss everyone that went away for school, but I did promise to go visit Celeste and Francis this year which will be easier because I live with mom and I don't have to pay much rent.

So that part of the entry I wrote a few weeks ago and I have no clue where I was going with it :P

Anyways, I really want to find time for stuff other than school and work but it is so hard. I am so behind on readings and everything. Good thing though, I got back my first test mark and I did well. ^.^ I did not expect that. I have to take all my time this week and study; try to catch up with some of my readings. Fasting ends tomorrow and Curtis goes home probably this weekend. I am pretty boring these days.

Well I have to head to work and try not to be pissed at people trying to test my patience. -twitch-

Summer is going by so fast and I am not getting to hang out with people as much as I would like. Knowing that everyone is leaving in a few weeks makes me wanna spend as much time with them as possible, but it is hard because I work so much. I have been working seven days straight because I work for two stores now, not one. The days I get off at Bentley's, I work at Xcetera.
I am busy ever day I get off, whether it is with Matt or me going on some party, it isn't often. Me and Kelley stopped being friends for a month, and then we started being best friends again. I really hate losing friends, it makes me wonder what I could of done to prevent it. New friendships grow everyday though, and I'll always have some people, that I know.
This weekend I am going to Turo to see a blues concert with Brad, and then I am going camping in porters lake with Celeste and Chris and a whole bunch of people. Should be a fun weekend.
Hope everyone is well :)

Lets look at my life. It changes everyday. I am stress. I work almost everyday. I find out another person hates me, which by now I have comes to not mind anymore. I feel disconnected, like I am in another world and everyone is just walking around mine. I go to Nfld in two days and it feels like just yesturday I was arranging to go over there with dad on the phone. I'm so frustrated, I can't grasp on to anything because life is passing by so quickly...don't you all remember when we first met...in grade 10 or 11 maybe even junior high. God back then you got to see everyone everyday.
Hopefully I am going to drink away all these memories.Thanks to NFLD!
:D
Cause we all know how happy everyone is!

Last night I came on livejournal and I looked at my layout and
I was really sick of looking at it, I may not post very often
but I look a livejournal everyday. Well not everyday, but every time
I get on a computer. It's really pretty you should all take a look a it.
I have been trying to find a layout about rain for a long time.
It's one of my favorite things. RAIN!!!! Not the cold hard rain,
the soft warm summer and spring rain, mmmmmm. Please let summer come,
it's still so cold here. I still have to wear my winter coat.
I am ging to a punk concert on saturday with Danni and Becky,
which I am excited for because I get to dress up all punky and drink beer
and listen to crazy music with my old work buddies that are now good friends!
Oh by the way Becky...Hugs!!!!I'm so sorry :(
I'll see you tonight at work though, and I'll hug you tons,
I promise.
For everyone out there reading this, if you need me before 6:00pm on a weekday,
you will not call, you will send me a text message because
I can not afford to answer your calls otherwise.
I don't want to sound like a bitch but the phone bill is getting up there
every month and Edna is poor soooo message me instead, it only costs 10 cents
instead of 35 cents a minute.
Also I need new funky music, anyone got any?????? I need it, please send it to me. :)

IT makes no sense.
I had no fun.
I think Im depressed.
FUCK.

I have finally found an apartment for my mother, and shall move back in with her either in August or maybe right before May. It is pretty and close to Halifax Shopping Centre and is one of the nicest apartments I have seen here in Hali that is not 1000 bucks.
Im excited for my birthday, its only 6 days away and Im gonna get to hang out with so many people. I love spending time with friends, Im just so busy I dont get to do it often. Any ideas where I should go?
I wasnt gonna drink this weekend because I was going to save all my energy for next weekend seeing I am going out friday and saturday, but when I called Brad he envited me to this party in Hali and soo I got Becky to go with me.The party was interesting thats for sure. I met people,dont remember their names though, wait! One girl was named Kate and she admitted to me that she rathered girls over guys, hahaha, she was drunk. Like everyone else there. Some other guy was named Moses, Becky and I found out that his gf of four years just broke up with him two days ago and took all of his shit.Yup, it was an interesting night, especially coming home, you could not get a taxi, so we walked from spring to the casino. Waited at the casino for half an hour or so and then off to home I went.
Well thats my exciting life, off to work I go at 4.
You guys better be with me on my b-day :)
Happy Days Everyone!